Paradigm shift. . .

dis-ease can come from the "family language" that we all speak to each other. The only way to get rid of nagging pains and self damaging behaviour is to learn the language that your culture is speaking and the language you are speaking. If your family speaks shaming, abandonment and/or guilt language (actual words or actions) in everyday life, you are going to be affected by it in a negative way. You need to learn to listen to your bodies signals (tension, heat (anger, embarrasment) and cold (abandonment) and the places that manifest them. When you start to do this, you can then start to pinpoint situations and places as well as personal behaviours (yes, you can speak shaming etc. to yourself and most of us do it fluently) that are making you lose the "JOY" in your life. . .killjoys. This is what Dr. Mario Martinez calls those actions, symbols and words that we use to kill of the joy in our lives.

Most of us learned this as young children and we need to examine these feelings and the negative language that we are so fluent in.
Once you change that, you have to replace it with a new, positive language and symbols.
Your culture needs to have a "Subculture" that is built into it that you can then interact with and grow in joy with. New friends, family members that are joyful and learning to speak to yourself in positive ways. This does not mean saying "I am happy" when you are actually not. It means that you have to do the examining and self searching and then "clean your biology" with relaxation techniques and a slow acknowledgement of what you are doing to yourself and others. Then you can slowly start to integrate the new behaviour into the old spaces that were inhabited by your old cultural conditioning. . .

Whew, sounds complicated but it really isn't once you start. . .

Eric